ifagotto

Work has started and is going to increase in frequency throughout the next few weeks, ending with a BANG including an overseas trip for work. In the meantime, its going to be hectic with PSP going away for a week to attend a conference, one performance at Esplanade and 2 camps. Ah. Big Wen is also going to change her school and starts on 1 Nov. This means I have to monitor the after effect of this change (its a new school so the class is relatively small when she joins. Like. 4 kids.) Plus a new school environment means new viruses and bugs. Which also means Small Wen might also fall ill.

Which he has.

The GP said its loosely termed as a '2nd child syndrome', where the older kid brings back illnesses from school and passes it to the younger one, without the older kid himself actually falling ill. Small Wen is currently suffering from a cough and is using the nebulizer and antibiotics to cure the illness. GP also prepped us by saying there will be more to come at a regular frequency. Whilst this does help build up immune system for Small Wen, it does mean that we must be more careful due to his age.

Good news? My 10 week old baby is a nice hefty 6.6kg. *gulpz*

As you can tell, its been a very tiring week trying to get many things done. and its often been a 18h non stop event that does not include rest for me. Its been a very painful experience trying to schedule 'duties' with the kids (pick up, drop off etc) with me picking up most of it, rushing from work to school to bring her home. Proportion of life has definitely changed priorities. With Big Wen a little grown, I did regain some of my time and independence back (simply because she was less dependent on me), but with the inclusion of Small Wen, it feels like its reverted back to square 1 and worse. The worst times are when Big Wen is home from school. Mommy is preparing dinner, Grandma is helping to bathe and change Big Wen. Its good if Small Wen, but that period of time (evening to night) is actually his most active where he sleeps less than 30min each time.

I think everyone in the family is adjusting to having Small Wen around, from Big Wen to grandma and even Ah Yi who is seldom around. But I think I have had to make the biggest adjustments with nothing left for myself. Somehow it feels like PSP doesn't seem to get this part and is very much involved in doing his own things and not learning to say NO to other people when he can. (Maybe its easier to say NO to the wife). You may say he is bringing home the bacon.... so he needs to work and recharge etc... but.... Thats a really tiny piece of bacon. I bring home bacon too, and where does that leave me? (yes... you can tell I'm really SORE about this :s)

I'm exhausted and tired out. Spent the wee hours in the morning on Tuesday (think 3am) trying to coordinate schedules and my body simply hasn't caught up. I don't know how I've been surviving at all the past week as I've had little sleep or rest. Someone needs to invent a Mommy battery!

Or maybe one should chose to be a SAHM or FTWM. Not both.

I am agitated and upset.

So, things have obviously changed with the new addition, and I seriously wonder how mothers who are involved with all the aspects of family retain their sense of self in all that chaos. (BTW, I have a friend who is a SAHM, and I really wonder how she manages it all!) Much juggling to do, including PW who does not seem to like to sleep! He is awake for most part of the day, and although he isn't really fussy, he likes to be carried (and lets you know it).

I need arms for loan! Any volunteers??

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Tried another recipe for ketchup a few days back, turned out to be quite succesful. Pictures and recipe to be followed soon!

Chilli flakes + Ketchup = Chilli sauce?
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I was actually going to post a long rant onto LJ, but reading back on what I was typing, I could not really make sense of what I was typing. My line of thought all jumbled and incoherent. So I deleted everything.

Haiz

I know its been a long time since I posted an entry, but with FB, Whatsapp and having a new addition to the family, there really hasn't been much spare time to update. I guess I can safely say - I Am Back! Why? Because there are just certain things that cannot be vented out on FB ;p (Yes, you read right... Bitchy stuff gets said here! ;p)

That aside, life has been really crazy now that our family has grown by one. I was really appreciating (and enjoying!) having the firstborn older and more independent. Little things like her being able to feed herself through an entire meal really meant I had more freedom to taking more time to eat and I could have more 'personal time' since she was in school.

Well. All that has changed :( It has gone back to the days when I can't even go to move my bowels when I want and sleep is no more than 5 hours a night. Its been very different with the second one as his habits are vastly different from his sister's, but its really very much taking one step at a time. Its a good thing that work has generally stopped these few weeks, but its much very much hectic slavery at home. Whatever free time I have (read = baby is sleeping) is spent doing housework (laundry, ironing, keeping clothes, packing things - I've already purged a few areas, trying to get administrative work for job done, cooking, cleaning up, expressing milk AND trying to do work related readings. At this point of time, I feel exhausted, unappreciated and fat as hell.


opz

Rant over ;p

Post pregnancy ain't fun.

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You ever wonder how advertising (sublimal or otherwise) can be successful? I think breastfeeding is one of them. Breastmilk is touted as the holiest of all liquids that a baby should have, and there is a bombardment of material (print, audio and visual) that reafirms this fact.

All packaging states:

IMPORTANT NOTICE: Breast milk is the best for babies (and there is more after that)

There are also no advertisements or promotions for purchase of infant formula. The end result? A mom who cannot breastfeed her baby direct feels like she is th ultimate sinner who has done her child a great disservice and is setting her child up for the worst in life.

:s

As some of you can tell, I am one of these moms.

Being unable to latch the baby (parody99: that means letting the baby suckle the breast properly to get milk), I resorted to expressing the milk out and feeding baby from the bottle. Feeds are topped up with formula. Both kids were done that way, and I really wish I had known how stressful (and difficult!) it would be for me.

If you have friends who are going to give birth soon - give them encouragement and tell them the truth about BFing! Its fine if its easy for you (push the baby out, leave him at your breast and pop the nipple into his mouth. Voila!), but in realiy it really is not. I've read that it takes an average of 1 week for the baby to learn how to latch on properly, and that is first provided that the Mother has the 'ideal' nipple to add BFing.

Here's some interesting reading which I found last week:

http://www.fearlessformulafeeder.com/

I take heart from the fact that firstborn seems to be doing well despite not being brought up completely on breastmilk.

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ADD ON

As I type this second born has sleeping quite a bit throughout the day.

That scares me.

Because it implies he will be prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrretty active tonight.

*gulpz*

With the onslaught of FB et al, are you all still reading blogs?

Reply and let me know how many of you are still here!!!

Been so long since I posted, I had a suspicion that my account might have been automatically closed down ;p

Past few months have passed by in a blur, with much of time spent in toilets and generally feeling uncomfortable and out of sorts. All this through the usual haze of work and home. Hubby and Mom have born the brunt of it, with them taking over some of the usual stuff I do, especially on some of my worst moments.

I think the next few months will be even more exciting, and I am trying to avoid giving myself too much pressure, whilst wanting to push all the kids to do their best and achieve the 'more' that they always believe is out of their reach. I generally hope all things will work out, but many issues are quite '?' at the moment, with these few months being a good evaluation of future (maybe?) career change.

For those who have many ??? popping out on top of their heads, our family is expecting another addition in August :D

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I don't know if it is Singaporeans that are a nation of un-contented people, or its due to the internet and social networks like Facebook that really highlight such things and bring it to the spotlight.

I'm not sure if you do take the time to read your friend's 'status' updates, but what I read can really get me down (and upset).

The younger generation is always emo-ing (sometimes not even just the younger generation, students, but people who are close to our age) who seem to be ALWAYS dealing with some emotional issue or the other (many of them break ups with their other halves or getting emotional and depressed about the smallest of all things), and some people closer to our age are always posting and griping about everything and blaming it on the gah-men.

I think humans in general are very unappreciative of what they have, and are always quick to criticize others, and a LOT of the times without understanding what has to go through at the back of scene in order to make something happen! Sometimes I secretly wish karma would bite them in the ass and put them in the role of a government (minister etc) and see what THEY are able to come up with.

I don't know if that makes me less driven than my peers and laid back, but being a generally very unhappy person the first half of my life makes me want to appreciate current things more. Then again, sometimes I think I am just weird, I realized that I did certain activities in my teenage years, not because of peers in the group and being around friends, but because I wanted to do it :s

I'm so excited! I feel like I am a newlywed going for her honeymoon!

Wait a minute.

I am going for my honeymoon. Just that I am going as an oldly-wed. ;p

I'll be headed to Europe in a few days (yes, I know, despite the terrorist warnings), and I AM very excited! The plan is to fly to Paris over the weekend, meet up with hubby then train over to Amsterdam --> Brussels --> Paris before coming back to Singapore. (In case you are a bit lost, hubby's company is 'part sponsor' for this trip as he is there for the Festival Singapore (cultural exchange) now. I seriously don't think this trip would have been possible for us if not for the company, because they are literally 'paying' for his air tickets (which cost me a bomb!)

We've been trying to do some readings and research on the places where we want to go, but it seems to me that the general view is that Paris can be a very unsafe place to be (with someone who was studying there for a few years telling me to be PREPARED for the very worse!) Of course, that has my very anal brain flying in different directions!

I find myself more excited to be going to Amsterdam than anywhere else, maybe because I was there for WMC a few years back and really enjoyed myself, despite having been packed with 12h rehearsal days. This time, I should be able to make it in time for the flower market, and I really want to explore the market area and take in the sights. We will be staying in B&Bs in Amsterdam and Brussels. (The Amsterdam B&B was quite brusque with us, as if expecting us to create trouble, but was helpful enough to provide precise directions to their place. After telling us if we arrived too late for check in they would cancel our reservations :s) So I am looking forward to the cool (make that COLD) weather, lots of cherries and abundance of beer!!!

I have my reservations about Paris, but I just hope I will enjoy myself there. I think hubby is going to lose quite a lot of weight during this trip, as he is not much of a soup-bread-sandwich person, whilst I would be more than happy to eat those things for many days. The last leg of the trip will be spent in Paris, and I already have some things to buy from relatives. I am now thinking to myself - should I really buy myself a branded bag there? (For the uninformed, its a lot cheaper than what is available in SG, because of the taxes that you can claim off from the purchase. 12% if I am not wrong) Just because it is cheap and I can? My dar-link sister actually lent me her (old) Coach bag to use for a few days, and I have been using it. I DO like it, but its primarily because of the size and the way it can be carried, but I do know for sure that it would not matter to me whether or not it was a Coach bag. I guess if I do see something nice I might buy it, brand or no brand.

Its going to be a very quiet few days for us away from XW, and I think both of us really need this time off by ourselves. With work schedule being super hectic in the firs 6 months (when I get back, its back to work immediately!) we have not really had personal time and my own (quick) temper has been pushed a number of times. With even more interesting stuff coming up next year, life is going to be even MORE exciting!

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Its been heartening to know that despite being known as a nation of 'gripers', Singaporeans are showing solidarity in expressing their concern and admiration for the recently deceased Mrs LKY. She truly is an admirable female, and has accomplished things that many women can only think about and reach for as an ideal (of course, she did have the help of wait staff and all, but she is not superhuman!). I think lead a very fulfilling life, and to pass away at the ripe old age of 89 is already more than what I can hope for myself. The most touching this is the revelations between MM LKY and his wife, and the strength in the relationship is also something that we can only hope to aspire. With divorces as common as marriage, keeping a couple in union (same gender or not) is definitely an uphill task that requires the understanding and support from both. There is no denying Mdm Kwa's influence on the development of Singapore - without here, would we have MM Lee and PM Lee?

Whilst on the topic of being known as a nation of gripers - Singaporeans are constantly complaining about many various things in their life, and some defend themselves by saying if not for the complaining the government would not act. Whilst I can understand (and have griped about things myself, especially public transport) I think Singaporeans don't understand one thing - changes don't come easily, especially in the area of public administration and bureaucracy. Because Singapore is fair and justifies itself in many of her decisions and things that she implements, the government is always very careful (and anal) about being prepared for contingencies and having planned for things in advance. WAY in advance. Waves of change are never easy, but many people think that it can and should be done with a snap of the fingers. (Sometimes I just want to say - complain so much? Why don't you get involved in the government and implement the change?)

Some people think Singaporeans are generally 'stifled' and that we are not entitled to our free speech, but is 'free speech' (as defined by the West) worth the rest of the stuff that comes with it? I am more than happy to know that I can walk along the streets and into shops without worrying about people driving by and shooting their guns into me. I am satisfied to know if that I turn a dark corner the likelihood of me being robbed at gunpoint is small (did I tell you guys I know of a group of Singaporeans who were robbed OUTSIDE their hotel? The door of the hotel) and I don't have to worry about the safety of my family and friends. Too often we only air grievances, whilst we really don't show enough appreciation and understanding. Perhaps I am being ideal (or too ideal?) but life is really too short to be griping about such things.

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Something lighthearted to end the long post - spotted on hubby's FB status:

Going to Paris for a short performance soon. Osama must've heard about it & cause such a big fuss...haha

yes, this the degree of 'lame-ness' that I live with on a daily basis. Welcome to my life :)

Heard something that set me cracking up like crazy from my sister a few days ago...

She was volunteering at the purple event a few weeks ago, and apparently she got 'hit on' by the venue manager. His pick up line (or rather, SMS), was 'Have I ever told you that you walk like a model'

Then started this strange woman (me) laughing like a lunatic in the MRT.

The game? What do you consider your BEST pick up line? (or) What would you consider pick up lines that you would NOT touch with a barge pole? ;p

NOT TOUCH:
- You look like my primary school friend. (I think everyone learnt this from the TV ads of the old days)
- You remind me of this teacher I really liked in my primary school. (What is this? Role Play fetish!?)

The Tan-ners went up the Malaysian hills for a holiday - and boy... did I learn a few things.

1. I am an anal packer. Left to my own devices, I packed enough clothes (4D3N) for all 3 of us, any add on which will be needed for XW and any additional items which I might need for an emergency. What went into the luggage?
- Clothes and socks for all 3 of us (including the weather change) --> BTW, which needed to be packed and coordinated into the vacuum packs so I didn't have to open up too much stuff
- Diapers (25 pieces!!!)
- Emergency medication for XW (including the thermometer)
- Enough snacks to last all 4 days for XW
- Pillows/ bolster/ blanket for XW
- Towel for XW
- Toilet seat (so that she can park herself on the toilet bowl)
- Various chargers
- Packs of tissues/ wet wipes (don playplay! I used up a whole packet of traveling tissue and wet wipes)
- Toiletries for all 3 of us
- Cutlery and bowls for XW
- Stroller

And of course, all these had to be unpacked and returned into their respective storage areas, washed and laundered..........................

The trip wasn't quite fun for me, maybe because there were only the 3 of us. PSP went off to the casino both nights we were on the hill and I had to stay in since XW was sleeping. We spent the first day exploring the various hotels and play areas, the bulk of the 2nd day was spent in the indoor theme park where XW spent a lot of time on the carousels and riding trains. And that was all done with me (we only bought tickets for 1 adult and 1 kid, both non transferable since they use wrist band tagging) so I kind of got 'stuck' with XW duty all the way. Haiz. I hardly left indoors and didn't really enjoy the cold weather whilst I was there.

Spent the 4th day in KL was walking around randomly. (I'm not really a shopper) and by then I was already quite sianz and just wanted to get home. Fast.

We traveled by car (PSP drove). Getting to the hills were relatively easy, getting into KL and trying to find the hotel was a little trickier (especially moving off the expressway and getting to Bukit Bintang where the hotel was). Getting out, was damn confusing, and we went round and AROUND in circles. *haiz*

Whilst we stayed in Hotel Resort on the hills (which was really minimal and bad) the stay in KL was actually more fun because the hotel was (probably) more new and had better amenities. During the stay in Hotel Resort, the first night was spent without face towels (no loss there since we don't really use it) whilst the 2nd night was spent under a blanket without a cover sheet (yearps, just the old quilt with an almost transparent covering. It had been washed that often). Maybe its because the hotel is so well used, and the people will just keep coming (because of the casinos and theme parks), but one just gets the feeling that they don't really put much effort into the upkeep and maintenance (or standards) up on those hills. The funny thing that happened with us in the KL hotel? Look as we did (XW helped, opening all the doors and drawers multiple times!), we did not find the mini bar, nor the bottled water that was supposed to have been provided. Whilst we DID find a slot where the mini bar could/ should have been, these things were just not there (and they were, as stated in the welcome letter we found on the bed). Maybe it just wasn't our time to be overseas *haiz* Oh ya, the hotel in KL was cheaper than that up the hills, and its located just next to Lot 10 (that's where the shopping district is).

I read The Star on our last day in Malaysia, and one thing that hit me in my face was an article that mentioned that they were thinking of removing 2 major exams (1 of them is the equivalent of our PSLE and I *THINK* the 2nd exam is our equivalent of the streaming? Their Form 5 exams?) I think I'm too used to moving fast, and I must first say that I didn't go to too many places (and mostly for tourists anyway), but I found it difficult to communicate with the service staff (even the Chinese, not even when spoken to in Cantonese. Seems that many of them don't do English) and service was generally s l o w. NOT fun when you have a toddler who needs to be fed.

Would I go back again? Maybe 5 years later.

Ok, there were supposed to be a lot of photos, but I am having problems (duh) and only managed to upload this batch :(

So I made char siew, using the recipe from the Sunday Times on 17 August.

But before we go there, take a look at the mess as a result of the cooking :s This aluminum foil was at the bottom of the rack that the meat was roasting on. It was black, but it was sugary goodness! ;p



But this is the yummy end result:



I tried to do something a little different this time - by placing a white towel at the bottom to help provide some color contrast. Good idea? *hmz* Another view:



Review? This char siew was great! ;p Now that I know how to do it, I will NEVER eat those bought outside again! The whole dish cost me less than $8, considering that I went to buy a more expensive cut of meat from a butcher at the wet market. (I actually find the meat in the supermarket a lower quality, the color of the meat always seems a bit too pale for my taste, whilst this guy in the market has pork a slightly darker pink rather than pale white.)

Char Siew (adapted from the Sunday Times article, Hazel Low's original recipe for Char Siew Buo Luo Bao)

350g pork shoulder
3/4 tsp talk
2 tbs sugare
3/4 tbs vegetable oil
3/4 tbs hoisin sauce (Didn't have this, substituted with oyster sauce and dark soya sauce ;p)
2 tbs light soya sauce
3/4 tbs shaoxing wine (Had JUST ran out of this, used a potent homemade wine left over from my confinement ;p Its the GOOD and STRONG stuff)
110g honey
2 small shallots, finely chopped (I didn't have this, used 2 small red onions instead)
1 tsp roasted sesame seeds

1. Cut pork shoulder into 4cm wide strips (I used 4 finger width. Why on earth would I bring a ruler into the kitchen!?). Rinse and pat dry
2. Combine salt, sugare, vegetable oil, hoisin sauce, shaoxing wine, 85g honey and shallots. Microwave for 20seconds, mix well.
3. Place pork into marinade and leave (as long as possible! I left it in the fridge in a re-sealable bag for 2 days). Note: Remember to remove as much excess air as possible from the bag before the final sealing. I think this has something to do with bacteria and raw meat (I am guessing...)
4. Preheat oven to 230C (at least 30 minutes). Line a baking tray with aluminum foil and place a metal rack on the tray (to save my anal clean soul, I also opted to spray a thin layer of canola oil and my roasting rack set up)
5. Remove pork from bag, drip/ pat dry. (Reserve the marinade!) Roast for 15 minutes. Turn to other side for 15 minutes after.
6. Flip pork, brush with remaining honey (15g), roast for 3 minutes. Repeat with other side for 2 minutes.
7. Remove pork and leave to rest. (Applying the western principle here, I think this allows the molecules in the meat to rest and 'suck back' their own juices so that the meat will not turn out too dry.
8. Place marinade into non stick pan, and bring to a boil. (The original recipe includes adding a cornflour mixture into the marinade to thicken it but I skipped that).
9. Allow marinade to reduce into a slightly sticky glaze, pop char siew and sesame seeds in and coat thoroughly. Voila! Good with a bowl of steamed rice and vegetables!

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I bought a book from an online bookstore, in essence, its a book that promises that you only need 5 minutes a day to prepare a loaf of bread.

I initially had a few set up problems (their recipe calls for organic unbleached all purpose flour) and I am still figuring out the yeast issue (Different brands of yeast will respond differently in relation to the amount of flour/ water ratio.



The base of the bread stuck a little to my baking paper (recipe calls for something else :s)

http://www.artisanbreadinfive.com/ Here is the link if you are interested ;p I have not really refined my recipe (and still working out the kinks) and will probably have more time these few weeks to figure stuff out.

Flickrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr is giving me problems, I CANNOT upload my photos on it!

What are you guys using?